Wedding and Event News…. the blog

5 Essential Pre-Wedding Discussions via Elegala

• The “Don’t Leave the Toilet Seat Up” Tussle- Now’s the time to address any petty grievances you both may have ignored until now. You’ve heard it a thousand times, and it holds true here – communication is key. We know – blah, blah, blah – but it’s cliche for a reason. You need to clear the air now, because these little gripes, left unsaid, can build up underlying tension over the years – only to bubble over and explode into a completely unrelated future argument. Remember to keep this discussion productive and lighthearted. Nagging or initiating a screaming duel over his pants left on the floor (again) is not going to solve anything.
• The “You Want Me To Do What?” Melee- Unless a personal maid and assistant is on your bridal registry (a novel idea!), someone’s gonna have to scour the shared bathroom in your new dwelling. You’ll soon find that they key to marital bliss is agreement on whose task is whose. While an itemized chore list is a tad ambitious, lay out expectations in advance and avoid future blowups. You should know each other well enough by this point to divvy tasks accordingly: Common sense dictates that your fiancé who bounced three checks last month should relinquish bill duty, and if your white sheets are now gray, best hand over laundry duty. And while you’re divvying out chores, discuss broader marriage roles. How do you see yourself as a wife? A mother? A professional? How does he see himself?
• The “Festivus for the Rest of Us” Controversy- If your Christmas tree is his Festivus pole, it’s time to talk religion. Combining two faiths can be tricky. Discuss together your values, and identify what religious traditions are most meaningful for each of you to incorporate into your wedding ceremony and marriage. How will you combine holidays? Raise your children? And even if you share the same religious background, what role will religion play in your life together?
• The “Does This Make Me Look Fat?” Confrontation- ’Til death do you part… That allows an awful long time for your body to age. And even if you both succeed in fighting off middle-age weight gain, inevitable wrinkles, gray hairs, or hairs in the wrong places will eventually makeover your once-youthful selves. How are you going to deal? What are your expectations for your own and your spouse’s physical upkeep?
• The “You charged WHAT to the Visa?” Brawl- Financial woes are one of the main stressors in a marriage and a primary cause of divorce. For new couples, the topic of money can be uncomfortable – and certainly unromantic. But how romantic will it be when you’re forced to pawn that rock on your left finger to pay off your groom’s insurmountable gambling debts? Bottom line: Get over yourself, and practice full financial disclosure. What will be your combined income as a newly married couple? Do you have any current debt and how will you manage it together? Is there anything (real estate, travel, college fund) for which you’re willing to take on debt? How will you manage savings? Investments? How and when do you plan to retire? Learn more about planning for a healthy financial future with your fiance.